When was the last time you took a good look at why you're holding meetings? Walk into the meeting and state your intention and desired outcome. Then, periodically through the meeting, revisit both to make sure you're getting what you need. If not, redirect or adjourn it. Stating your desired outcomes shifts you to working smarter, faster and better.
Time is your most precious commodity. Don't waste it for you and others.
Tuesday, January 15, 2013
Cultivating Authenticity
I hear so many people tell me they want to be taken seriously and viewed as a strong leader. If you try to please the world and be the end all and be all to everyone, people are going to start to wonder about who the true you is and you know how you feel when that happens to you. It starts to erode trust.
Are you willing to let go of what other people think? My motto is "What someone else thinks of me is none of my business, It's theirs.
Are you willing to let go of what other people think? My motto is "What someone else thinks of me is none of my business, It's theirs.
Tuesday, December 18, 2012
The Gift of Laurier LaPierre
I'm sitting here with memories of Laurier running through my mind, as I'm sure is the same for so many others right now. All bring me a smile, make me laugh or shake my head in wonder. I remember sitting with Laurier and Harvey at a friend's birthday party (pre Ray) when Laurier turned to my date and told him he was an idiot for not appreciating me enough. That made for an interesting rest of the evening! Still, I found myself gravitating back to the two of them as the conversations weren't anywhere near as fascinating with anyone else. That was what it was like being in their company. Never enough time with them…always treasured moments.
Sitting with Laurier in his living room in conversation to capture for my book, we bantered, conversed, laughed and cried while the dog sat between us, looking back and forth at us, perplexed as if he understood every word. I wish I could have captured the spectrum of emotion for you in Laurier's voice as much as his words. No one loved our country as much as he did. And he let us know it through every word and action.
Having them over for dinner and seeing my kids and family touched by his magic was a gift beyond measure. I am so glad they had a chance to get to know him, even a bit.
Harvey and Laurier were generous enough to have a dinner party in honour of the launch of my book. At one point I found myself sitting next to Laurier. He insisted I do a reading for the group. Of course I picked the piece about him, to which Laurier kept stopping me until I would choose someone else. He teased me and taunted me until I couldn't think straight never mind read! One of the guests turned to me and said "He must really love you. I've never seen him tease anyone like this ever!" That too stayed with me. I think my whole being was smiling at that point.
Last year I made a cake for them for the holidays. This cake is present at all our family functions; holidays, birthdays, and impromtu get-togethers. Harvey was only worried that Laurier would find it in the freezer and start munching on it before the family gathering so was trying to figure out the best time for me to bring it over. I walked into their kitchen with the cake and another small wrapped package. Laurier was about to commandeer the cake before it hit the freezer, but instead, I gave him the small wrapped package. I had made him his own personal loaf which I told him I'd only give him if he'd leave the big one alone at least until the family dinner.
As the cake issue was settled, we dove into conversations about friendships and what that means, who was a true friend and who really wasn't, family, holidays, politics and everything else under the sun.
Those times were precious. Never enough. But when you're lucky enough to have known someone like Laurier, could there ever be enough time?
I'll leave you with some of Laurier's words of wisdom. I asked Laurier "What message do you want to give to the next wave of leaders in Canada? What spark do you want to light in them?" to which he replied:
"Be more conscious of our freedom in this country. Get to know people. Travel, first in our country, then through the world. Get to know Canadians. We may not have fought as many wars as other countries, but in the ones we did fight, no one has ever denied our courage. We are great conciliators. A fundamental flaw is our own people don’t know this country. They only know their region. They go to the U.S. and travel before they’ll travel in Canada. Go to Nunavut. Get to know the people who live in the snow. Watch Canadian programs! Write more.
We are the first country to believe in diversity. The question of language is no longer necessary. Get to know people's souls. It's in their art and literature. Learn languages. Travel. I want the people of my country to know the stories of my country. Look at human courage. Education is more than knowledge…it's an instrument of discussion. Know what makes our country be right now. Connect with people. We used to have pen pals. Now, through technology, it's even easier. Use technology that is available to you to be better human beings. Better human beings make a better world. Ultimately, if you fail, you will be the generation of the greatest failure in the history of mankind." (Excerpt from Leaders: Their Stories, Their Words - Conversations with Human-Based Leaders.)
I didn't have a chance to say it before, but thank you, Laurier, for all you've brought to my life. Be at peace. You'll be in our hearts forever.
Sitting with Laurier in his living room in conversation to capture for my book, we bantered, conversed, laughed and cried while the dog sat between us, looking back and forth at us, perplexed as if he understood every word. I wish I could have captured the spectrum of emotion for you in Laurier's voice as much as his words. No one loved our country as much as he did. And he let us know it through every word and action.
Having them over for dinner and seeing my kids and family touched by his magic was a gift beyond measure. I am so glad they had a chance to get to know him, even a bit.
Harvey and Laurier were generous enough to have a dinner party in honour of the launch of my book. At one point I found myself sitting next to Laurier. He insisted I do a reading for the group. Of course I picked the piece about him, to which Laurier kept stopping me until I would choose someone else. He teased me and taunted me until I couldn't think straight never mind read! One of the guests turned to me and said "He must really love you. I've never seen him tease anyone like this ever!" That too stayed with me. I think my whole being was smiling at that point.
Last year I made a cake for them for the holidays. This cake is present at all our family functions; holidays, birthdays, and impromtu get-togethers. Harvey was only worried that Laurier would find it in the freezer and start munching on it before the family gathering so was trying to figure out the best time for me to bring it over. I walked into their kitchen with the cake and another small wrapped package. Laurier was about to commandeer the cake before it hit the freezer, but instead, I gave him the small wrapped package. I had made him his own personal loaf which I told him I'd only give him if he'd leave the big one alone at least until the family dinner.
As the cake issue was settled, we dove into conversations about friendships and what that means, who was a true friend and who really wasn't, family, holidays, politics and everything else under the sun.
Those times were precious. Never enough. But when you're lucky enough to have known someone like Laurier, could there ever be enough time?
I'll leave you with some of Laurier's words of wisdom. I asked Laurier "What message do you want to give to the next wave of leaders in Canada? What spark do you want to light in them?" to which he replied:
"Be more conscious of our freedom in this country. Get to know people. Travel, first in our country, then through the world. Get to know Canadians. We may not have fought as many wars as other countries, but in the ones we did fight, no one has ever denied our courage. We are great conciliators. A fundamental flaw is our own people don’t know this country. They only know their region. They go to the U.S. and travel before they’ll travel in Canada. Go to Nunavut. Get to know the people who live in the snow. Watch Canadian programs! Write more.
We are the first country to believe in diversity. The question of language is no longer necessary. Get to know people's souls. It's in their art and literature. Learn languages. Travel. I want the people of my country to know the stories of my country. Look at human courage. Education is more than knowledge…it's an instrument of discussion. Know what makes our country be right now. Connect with people. We used to have pen pals. Now, through technology, it's even easier. Use technology that is available to you to be better human beings. Better human beings make a better world. Ultimately, if you fail, you will be the generation of the greatest failure in the history of mankind." (Excerpt from Leaders: Their Stories, Their Words - Conversations with Human-Based Leaders.)
I didn't have a chance to say it before, but thank you, Laurier, for all you've brought to my life. Be at peace. You'll be in our hearts forever.
Tuesday, November 27, 2012
They Have Our Backs, Who Has Theirs?
It recently came to my attention that the Canadian Forces and their families are dealing with some devastating issues with regards to Home Equity Assistance (HEA) due to relocation for their jobs. Systemic HEA denial has cost these families dearly in every aspect of their lives.
They have our backs. Who has theirs? This community has reached out to ask Canadians for their support. Please help them spread the word as, if you're like me, someone who is not in the military but one who is grateful to live in this amazing country, you had no idea that this was going on either.
In the words of one family (of many) who are affected (and let me add that it took a great deal of courage to speak out):
After over three years, I am speaking out about some very significant issues facing Canadian Forces families upon relocation, ours being one of the more significantly affected. To date,a systemic denial of 100% HEA entitlements has cost families out of pocket and continues to keep them in the red each month.
Systemic HEA denial has cost families their relationships, bankruptcy, careers, health, quality of life and welfare. I would encourage anyone to read into this group and involve yourselves in the upcoming debate in the House of Commons on Tuesday, 27 Nov 2012 by contacting your MP. I have started this discussion group so that ensuing discussions can be an informed one.
To put this into context, since having our first child (12 years ago) we have relocated five times. Our single income family has lost over $200,000 due to the blanket denial of Home Equity Assistance entitlement during our last relocation. As for other CF families, between 2007-2010 there were 149 applications for HEA and ALL OF THEM WERE DENIED by Treasury Board Secretariat.
This has left our family doing without, our retirements savings gone, significant debts and exhausting the redress system. The only option left now is a Judicial Review costing tens of thousands of dollars, and even that does not provide a solution, but opens the door for a class action. Members in our situation do not have money to pay a legal team and are therefore denied justice.
Should our Canadian Forces soldiers be forced to wait 3+ years, take the Government of Canada to Federal Court and sell off their assets in order to get an "entitlement"? That's exactly what had to happen with the SISIP clawback lawsuit recently. Surely, there must be some accountability for TBS decision making process.
I know that after almost three and a half years of patiently applying for and grieving our entitlement decision, I have little left to sell, and am therefore out of time. I am not willing to declare bankruptcy for an issue which is clearly identified and supported by the Chief of Defence Staff, the Canadian Forces Ombudsman and the Canadian Forces Grievance Authority. All of whom are supportive, but have no authority to provide relief.
24 years of service in my situation equates to an unsustainable financial situation. If people knew what we have had to do to survive these last three years, they would be horrified. This is only one family's case.
After 24 years of service, having to take on the Treasury Board in Federal Court, at a cost of tens of thousands of dollars, to obtain an entitlement is not "supporting our troops".
I have taken on this issue on behalf of many, many soldiers and their families. Knowing full well the effects of suffering huge financial burdens, the effects on health, career, family, opportunity and relationships.
I encourage your assistance in passing the word and engaging this discussion in a public forum. Please help us. Share your opinion and support with your Member of Parliament.
They have our backs. Who has theirs? This community has reached out to ask Canadians for their support. Please help them spread the word as, if you're like me, someone who is not in the military but one who is grateful to live in this amazing country, you had no idea that this was going on either.
In the words of one family (of many) who are affected (and let me add that it took a great deal of courage to speak out):
After over three years, I am speaking out about some very significant issues facing Canadian Forces families upon relocation, ours being one of the more significantly affected. To date,a systemic denial of 100% HEA entitlements has cost families out of pocket and continues to keep them in the red each month.
Systemic HEA denial has cost families their relationships, bankruptcy, careers, health, quality of life and welfare. I would encourage anyone to read into this group and involve yourselves in the upcoming debate in the House of Commons on Tuesday, 27 Nov 2012 by contacting your MP. I have started this discussion group so that ensuing discussions can be an informed one.
To put this into context, since having our first child (12 years ago) we have relocated five times. Our single income family has lost over $200,000 due to the blanket denial of Home Equity Assistance entitlement during our last relocation. As for other CF families, between 2007-2010 there were 149 applications for HEA and ALL OF THEM WERE DENIED by Treasury Board Secretariat.
This has left our family doing without, our retirements savings gone, significant debts and exhausting the redress system. The only option left now is a Judicial Review costing tens of thousands of dollars, and even that does not provide a solution, but opens the door for a class action. Members in our situation do not have money to pay a legal team and are therefore denied justice.
Should our Canadian Forces soldiers be forced to wait 3+ years, take the Government of Canada to Federal Court and sell off their assets in order to get an "entitlement"? That's exactly what had to happen with the SISIP clawback lawsuit recently. Surely, there must be some accountability for TBS decision making process.
I know that after almost three and a half years of patiently applying for and grieving our entitlement decision, I have little left to sell, and am therefore out of time. I am not willing to declare bankruptcy for an issue which is clearly identified and supported by the Chief of Defence Staff, the Canadian Forces Ombudsman and the Canadian Forces Grievance Authority. All of whom are supportive, but have no authority to provide relief.
24 years of service in my situation equates to an unsustainable financial situation. If people knew what we have had to do to survive these last three years, they would be horrified. This is only one family's case.
After 24 years of service, having to take on the Treasury Board in Federal Court, at a cost of tens of thousands of dollars, to obtain an entitlement is not "supporting our troops".
I have taken on this issue on behalf of many, many soldiers and their families. Knowing full well the effects of suffering huge financial burdens, the effects on health, career, family, opportunity and relationships.
I encourage your assistance in passing the word and engaging this discussion in a public forum. Please help us. Share your opinion and support with your Member of Parliament.
Tuesday, October 23, 2012
The Essence of Great Leadership
Some leaders can have a meeting or retreat with their executive team over an eight hour period and basically give a state of affairs of that organization, what strategies they believe are key to the success of the organization and of what to improve and how. And yet they don't look at the critical pieces to this puzzle which are the people who will be implementing the change and how.
"Leadership for today's world requires enlarging one's capacity to see the whole board as in a chess match - to see the complex, often volatile interdependence among the multiple systems that constitute the new commons." - Leadership Can be Taught, by Sharon Daloz Parks
Great leaders play chess rather than checkers with their people. They understand that all the pieces move differently, that people aren't motivated by the same things, or learn in the same way. Great leaders discover what is unique about each person and capitalize on it. They must play a unique role. to rally people toward a better future. They instigate. They are driven by their compulsion for a better future and do everything in their power to get other people to come together to make this future come true.
By definition they’ll be successful in leading only when they find a way to make many people, regardless of each person's uniqueness, excited by and confident in this better, shared future. That is the essence of great leadership.
"Leadership for today's world requires enlarging one's capacity to see the whole board as in a chess match - to see the complex, often volatile interdependence among the multiple systems that constitute the new commons." - Leadership Can be Taught, by Sharon Daloz Parks
Great leaders play chess rather than checkers with their people. They understand that all the pieces move differently, that people aren't motivated by the same things, or learn in the same way. Great leaders discover what is unique about each person and capitalize on it. They must play a unique role. to rally people toward a better future. They instigate. They are driven by their compulsion for a better future and do everything in their power to get other people to come together to make this future come true.
By definition they’ll be successful in leading only when they find a way to make many people, regardless of each person's uniqueness, excited by and confident in this better, shared future. That is the essence of great leadership.
Wednesday, September 19, 2012
The Power of One
I love Seth Godin's blog this morning The Power of One a Day. I can't tell you how many people ask me how they can market themselves, their work or an idea and look at their marketing plan as this huge entity that, even in concept, is overwhelming. Because it's so big, they park it and just get on with their every day lives and what they've always done. They don't do what they have to do, even what step at a time, to be remarkable.
I maintain that life can be complex but doesn't have to be overly complicated. Seth's post is a perfect example of that.
Before you go diving in and doing everything on Seth's list, I'll ask you to answer a few questions for yourself. First of all, what are you really great at? It's much easier to market yourself and your work if you're brilliant at it and others can see that you are.
Start there.
Secondly who don't you know who you need to know? Start meeting and having those percolating conversations with people who will 'grow' you and your way of thinking and vise versa. Lastly, what don't you know that you need to know? Make everything you do a learning and growth experience for you and those you interact with.
Now go build your mountain. Get ready. It's going to be HUGE!
I maintain that life can be complex but doesn't have to be overly complicated. Seth's post is a perfect example of that.
Before you go diving in and doing everything on Seth's list, I'll ask you to answer a few questions for yourself. First of all, what are you really great at? It's much easier to market yourself and your work if you're brilliant at it and others can see that you are.
Start there.
Secondly who don't you know who you need to know? Start meeting and having those percolating conversations with people who will 'grow' you and your way of thinking and vise versa. Lastly, what don't you know that you need to know? Make everything you do a learning and growth experience for you and those you interact with.
Now go build your mountain. Get ready. It's going to be HUGE!
Monday, September 03, 2012
Work / Life Balance is a Myth
Work / life balance, in reality, is a myth. To believe we can balance our work and life to the "nth" degree so that everything fits perfectly in its place assumes that life is controllable and static, at least long enough to control it. Nor does it take into consideration all the external factors at play which we have no control of.
Years ago one of the lead performers for the Cirque du Soleil was asked how he can keep his balance. His answer, which definitely applies to this was, "I don't keep my balance and stay still. I'm constantly readjusting".
To have any sort of a balanced life we have to learn to dance in real time with whatever comes our way. That's what keeps us resilient, readjusting and being able to stay psychologically balanced no matter what.
Years ago one of the lead performers for the Cirque du Soleil was asked how he can keep his balance. His answer, which definitely applies to this was, "I don't keep my balance and stay still. I'm constantly readjusting".
To have any sort of a balanced life we have to learn to dance in real time with whatever comes our way. That's what keeps us resilient, readjusting and being able to stay psychologically balanced no matter what.
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