What Do You Suck At?

Danielle LaPorte asked the burning question "What do you suck at?" A GREAT question!

For me there are a few answers. I'll get the ball rolling and ask you to throw in your three cents as well....

I suck at accepting praise. When someone compliments me, I give them every reason in the book as to why "it" happened but I'm not a part of the equation. I have to learn to say thank you.

I'm horrible at delegating. I eliminate delay in all its forms (whenever possible) so have a hard time waiting for someone to get something done. 

I'll add to this over time. 

I live by "When at first you don't succeed, try something you've already been successful at and become masterful at it". That frees up others to step up and show their mastery in areas where I suck. Thus a great partnership or team is formed!

What do you suck at?

 

What Does Your Picture Look Like?

Life is a puzzle. How you put the pieces together will paint what your life's picture will look like. What pieces are missing? How do you find them and complete the picture?

I was reading Peter Bregman's piece this morning about "Who Are You Really Mad At?" How we treat others is a huge puzzle piece and creates a ripple effect for how others will do the same and whether or not we'll be viewed (and treated) with respect.

A part of that are the questions "Are you living your own story or one that others have of you? Are you living the life others think you should be living or one of your own choosing?" Answer the question and then put those puzzle pieces together.

Getting Out of Your Own Way

I'm just back from speaking at the International Congress of Coaching Psychology in Sydney Australia, To say it was an extraordinary experience is an understatement. In the sharing and teaching I learned many things, which is, for me, the beauty of teaching; not only to share what I know and do but to see how it's absorbed, viewed and how people might integrate what they learned into their current practices.

This was probably the most advanced group I've ever worked with. What occurred to me, and I believe is relevant for leaders, teachers, professionals in the human systems realm and all others who help people grow for a living was how so many extraordinary people hold themselves back from being remarkable.

So I asked just that question. "In what way are you standing in your own way of being remarkable?" Some had a difficult time embracing the label remarkable in any way. When we dove into that question, the subsequent ones that came to mind (and were asked) were "If you're stopping yourself from shining, why in the world would any of your clients believe that you can see it in them? How are you modeling what you strive to do with others?"

It's not about ego or conceit. It's about allowing yourself to do everything in your power to make a difference.

Many practitioners need a script or a framework within which to work with their clients, staff, students, whoever your target audience is. I maintain that in order to do our best work, we need to get out of our framework and enter theirs to understand where they are to see their capacity and potential. It's working from within their story, not yours.

Are you getting in your own way of being remarkable? What would the global impact be if all the extraordinary people we know (or heard about) held themselves back?

What's Your Excuse?

Great leaders don't look for excuses why they can't do things; they look for all the possibilities that will support their goals and dreams and those of their staff.  Here's a great video to remind us of just that. 

What "reasons" do you have to let go of?

John Spence Speaks on "The Most Important Thing I Have Ever Learned"

John Spence is a Human-Based Leader extraordinaire. It's not only what he says and does...it's the core of who he is. His story in my book in Leaders, Their Stories, Their Words has inspired people around the world. 

This TED talk is yet another indication of he not only turned his life around but how he deeply and profoundly impacts people in a myriad of ways.  It's an honor and privilege to know him.

Putting on a Human Face to Build Trust

In a great article that speaks to Human-Based Leadership™, the authors, Don Peppers and Martha Rogers Ph.D speak of how "Corporations Must “Put on a Human Face” to Build Customer Trust

We can never really know someone else's intention. Any person's motive is internal to the person. It's in the mind. All we can do is observe their behavior—what they do, how they look, what they say out loud."

Are these leaders paying attention and being mindful of those around them? Are they leading others through positive impact, inspiration, caring, and recognition of their people's unique talents and strengths? These attributes are evident and easy to identify. They also go a long way in growing and retaining talent. The characteristics of a human-based leader serves as a strong foundation for leadership which considers ethics, personal values, diversity, and social responsibility.

The more we identify and applaud these HB Leaders, the greater the shift from 'power-over others' style of leadership to 'power with others'.

Tell me about the Human-Based Leaders in your life. We'd love to feature them in a conversation.

Promises Made and Kept

The concept of kept promises seems to be ambiguous of late. I was just having this conversation with a colleague the other day. Many make promises at the drop of a hat without any reflection beforehand. Can they keep the commitment? Do they have the bandwith to add something else to their plate before saying "I'll do this" or "I'll be there" before they dive in and make that promise? 

Others love to use the expressions " I hope to be able to". Hope doesn't make things happen. Doing makes things happen. Or "I'll try to...." As Yoda is famous for saying "Try? Try not. Do!" If you don't have the bandwith to do it properly and in the timeframe you promised, then don't.

This morning in Seth Godin's blog, "Specific Promises, Kept" he hit the nail right on the head when he stated :"The power of the specific, measurable and useful promise made and kept is difficult to overstate." 


The thing is, it's up to us as the recipient of the promise to hold the other accountable. That's not to say we have control over whether or not other people honor their commitments. We have the right to decide whether or not to engage with and believe in that individual in the future. After all, we are our word. If we promise lightly with no intention of honoring that promise why would people trust us in the future? And why would they expect we will trust them in return if their words are empty?


The biggest gift you can give clients, customers, colleagues, friends and family alike is to be honest about what we can give and do.... and what we can't.