"To strip an idea down to its core, we must be masters of exclusion. We must create ideas that are both simple and profound, something so laser and to the point that an individual can want to spend a lifetime becoming masterful at it. Once we know something, we can't begin to imagine what it would be like to not know it"

That is the world of Shadow Coaches™ and their clients.

In the world of coaching, we have to be at least two steps ahead of current trends. If we can't think outside the box we're not serving our clients. And if we give clients what they think they can get instead of what they need and want, then we're serving ourselves first. Coaching is about the clients, supporting them, partnering with them and helping them stretch beyond where they've ever been before to fly.

As Coaches, we have a finite amount of time available to us to coach clients on the fly, in the centre of complex challenges in chaotic times. Unlike most coaching sessions, shadow and laser coaching sessions can be a matter of moments in time, where we coach on one thought, one moment in time that had just unfolded in such a way that when they're coached on it, they not only "get it" but it sticks.

Add to that equation working with client's shadow personalities, and not only do they 'get it' but they embrace it, all aspects of themselves within the context of their worlds as they know them.

Combining evidence with patterns of behavior I can say that 50% of the data I use when Shadow Coaching my clients is what they don't tell me. It's located between their words. I discern what wasn't said, pick up what wasn't evident and become a catalyst so my clients could discover what it was they weren't aware of, in real time. It's all about context.

It's fast, dynamic, powerful and, because it happens in real time, they create sustainable change.

What circumstances unfolded where you would have benefited from having an observational Shadow Coach there to help you process what had just happened and learn from it, grow from it and respond rather than react to it? It's partnership without judgment....a rare occurrence in our lives these days.

For those of you who want more from your coaches (or want to work with a coach) remember to ask for what you want and don't settle.

Best!
Donna Karlin

Recently, on our Transformational Girlfriends blog (more about that in a moment) my friend and colleague and, as she calls herself (and is) my muse Susan Meyer wrote some insightful thoughts about the role of the Shadow in Appreciative Inquiry.

Susan Meyer writes...

"I am in the midst of a wonderful dialogue about the role of the Shadow in Appreciative Inquiry. This is shadow in the sense of the darker or unexpressed side, not Shadow in the sense of observer, as coined by Donna Karlin. Often, we work hard to eliminate anything that isn’t positive, light, cheerful. People say, “don’t dwell on the negative” or “lighten up” or “focus on the positive” as if it was possible to have a one-sided emotional spectrum. But the world is not one-sided. Emotions run a full range from joy to sorrow, ecstasy to depression. There is room for fear and anger alongside courage and compassion. In fact, how could one exist without the other? How could there be light without darkness? Day without night? Each shade in any spectrum has its own place.

I gained an new understanding of the word appreciation this morning. We have come to think of appreciation in a context drawn from finance - to grow in worth - and have come to see appreciation as solely positive. In a purer sense, though, to appreciate is to value - a term open to both light and shadow. I may appreciate the many joys in my life, and I may also appreciate the sorrows because of what they have taught me. As a coach and as a consultant, I can appreciate the shadow side of situations and experiences simply because they exist. As a practicing transformational girlfriend, I can allow space for the shadow side without encouraging permanent residence in that place and I can mine the shadows for the rich experiences that will inform the light."

As Coaches we are taught to look for the best in people, to look for talents and strengths and to help our clients evolve because of them. As a Shadow Coach™, one who sees all sides to a person, especially their shadow personalities, I believe we become stronger, not only as we recognize and hone our talents and strengths but when we pay attention to our shadow personalities, accept them as an integral part of who we are and work with them as well. We have to accept all of who we are and make those choices that will help us evolve because of all of who we are, not just a select piece of our true selves.

Transformational Girlfriends is a group of "stellar women involved in the transformation of organizations, people’s lives, and yes, even global events. Truly incredible transformational women." We started off as 8 in a house in Connecticut, women who not only grow people for a living but are all individually reknowned and masterful in their areas of expertise. We figured we can really pack a punch globally if we got together to create transformative change.

So keep watching because we're working on some truly transformational things. I'll keep you posted!

Best..
Donna Karlin

Note: Have you signed up for our newsletter "Perspectives in Brief" yet? Tips on the run...to run with delivered right to your inbox. 2 minute reading time or less that will pack a punch. You'll also find out what's happening in the world of A Better Perspective™, new programs and services as they launch along with special launch rates for subscribers.

For those of you who want to hone your awareness skills, are leaders or grow people for a living, today (August 31, 2007) is the last day of the launch price for 'It's All About You....and Others' so sign up today!

And lastly but never least for those of you who want to explore diversity and cross cultural issues in the workplace, ICCO (The International Consortium for Coaching in Organizations) are hosting an international symposium in Toronto, Ontario, Canada, October 11 - 13th, 2007 on Leveraging Cultural Differences.

Participants will explore the idea of effectively operating in different cultural contexts is the integration and transformation of cultural knowledge, self/other awareness, and sensitivity to differences. The three cross-cultural contexts are interdependent and need to operate simultaneously. Appreciate how to leverage these three to move your organization forward.

Registration is capped at 30 attendees, so register as soon as possible to ensure a place in this cutting-edge event. Click here for more information or to register

Preconceived Notions

What is preconceived notions exactly? Pre-acting, clairvoyance? I’m constantly trying to figure out why people pre-act, absolutely ‘knowing’ what the future has in store in the realm of “this will never work’ this is ‘going to be’ a problem etc etc. They are already upset, angry, worried about something that hasn’t yet occurred. Clairvoyance 101? Crystal ball? Where exactly does that come from, I wonder?

What happens in life is not as important as how you accept it and what you do with it, but it has to happen first! So much energy goes into acting before the fact that what happens during and after pale by comparison.

Preconceived notions is in my category of behaviours that get people into trouble. They are in great company along with assumptions, expectations…and when you don’t articulate what those expectations are, then we’re back into Clairvoyance 101 as we expect everyone else to read our minds.

I’m just in the process of finishing up my program “It’s All About People….and About You” (stay tuned) and when I look at patterns of behaviour this one is at the top of the heap when it comes to erecting the ultimate roadblock to success. After all, how in the world will one succeed if they already see that it’s not going to work?

People (us included) are wonderful, aren’t they? With all our intelligence we do, think and imagine the strangest things. But it makes life interesting, especially for a Shadow Coach™ who sees it unfold in real time.

But you never pre-acted yourself, right? I thought not. Me either : )

Best!
Donna Karlin

* A couple of notes: First, welcome new subscriber from Macao! 94 countries and territories and counting! For those of you who wonder how to subscribe so you're notified when my blog has been updated, scroll down to the bottom right and you'll see a subscription box. Enter your email address and you'll stay current.

Secondly, check out my new blog on Fast Company Experts called Jumping Into the Deep End of Leadership. I know I know, three blogs and counting (don’t forget ExecuBooks Blog) but as they all hone my writing skills and allow me to virtually meet such amazing people, how in the world could I say or want to say no? Enjoy!