Saturday, January 22, 2005

A Change of Perspective

In preparing class material and notes for my School of Shadow Coaching, I decided to go over some of the files I had from an old R & D team I was involved in. A pattern came to light which I knew I had to create a section on for the class.

To backtrack for a moment, for those of you who read my blogs on a regular basis, as well as those of you who have worked with me, you know my opinion of making New Year’s resolutions and setting goals off the top of your head based on something that occurred to you in passing about 10 minutes before. I realised a great deal of Coaching and goal setting involves getting rid of something or changing something.

I also know, from surveys, polls and research that these kinds of goals are rarely achieved and even fewer realise the success of any resolution they set at the stroke of midnight on December 31st.

One of the things we had discussed in detail was the concept of Attracting or Attraction. Another was 'Absence Of' rather than 'Elimination Of'. i.e. what you don’t want isn’t there in the first place so there’s nothing to get rid of. You attract what you want, invent your future as I call it, rather than react to the present. Even better, in my opinion is inventing your present which, in turn creates a future you love.

As the School of Shadow Coaching is delving into advanced Coach proficiencies, one of the things I want to stress with students and clients alike, that has proven to be extremely powerful, is the concept of choosing the life you want, not existing or reacting to the status quo. It’s not changing, it evolving into who you choose to be. And it’s not spending time and energy dealing with getting rid of ‘stuff’. It’s creating great stuff, experiences and choosing to be with the people who energise you and help you learn and grow. Paradigm shift is from the negative to the positive. Which do you think is more energizing? Talking about all the stuff you can’t stand in your life, thereby feeling as if you have this train you’re pulling behind you, to, environments of every kind exactly as you want them?

Which would you choose? Which way of thinking would you benefit more from? I think the answer is quite self evident.

These choices you make aren’t for the next twelve months until you set another New Year’s resolution. These are ways of being, not time defined.

So I leave you with these questions….”What 15 aspects of you (your life) do you want to enjoy for the rest of your life, not just the immediate future?” and “What are you ready to let go of to have a life of your choosing, one that you love?”


Donna Karlin

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