Wednesday, August 02, 2006

People Never Reach Their Limits, They Only Think They Do

It’s amazing how often my biggest challenge as a coach is helping my clients past their ‘AHHA!” moments. Reaching the first wrung on the ladder towards achieving their goals can stop them dead and be the biggest roadblock to the realization of their dreams. Go figure!

Still, once they reach half way and are flying, many don’t want to ‘press their luck’ as they’re doing better than ever before and I hear “Maybe I should quit while I’m ahead”. Why in the world they would think of quitting when they’re halfway there is beyond me! But they do. My job as a Shadow Coach is to make them aware of this and help them past it.

People’s personal and professional lives are integrated even if they think they’re separate. And if a family member or close friend is struggling, that can often be stumbling block #2 in my client’s road to succeeding, for how can they fly without feeling guilty that others close to them aren’t doing the same? I wonder why they see that as something to hide rather than an inspiration to those around them.

People usually believe their actions and choices are right, even when it comes to putting on the brakes, so my work is cut out for me. It’s the fine line between helping them celebrate their road to success and not stopping dead because of that victory. There’s no ceiling, no limits to how high they can fly if they stop putting barriers in the way.

People never reach their limits until they impose limits on themselves.

People want things to be simpler, even if their actions say otherwise. That includes looking for all the reasons in the book why they can’t succeed. It would boggle their minds if they used that same energy to reach for the sky. My job is to figure out why they don’t and feed it back to them in some way they see what it is they’re doing….which is self sabotage. The funny thing about that is people don’t stay at the level of their most recent self-imposed roadblocks. They start spiraling downwards along with their waning enthusiasm.

People might want things to be simpler but find very innovative and creative ways to complicate life.

Life can become extremely complex, even when rich with opportunities and limitless possibilities. Even wonderful opportunities create pressures at a great cost. Success is seductive and often elusive when we chase after it instead of attracting it to us. Stop running towards something, and let life catch up to you. You’ll be amazed at what unfolds. It might just be a new definition of success.

Donna Karlin

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